by Lindsay | Apr 3, 2024 | Motivational, Relationships
Hello lovely readers,
I hope this finds you well. Today, I want to talk about something deeply personal and, I believe, relatable for many of us (unfortunately). As someone who’s recently become an empty nester and then gone through a divorce, I’ve found myself living alone for the first time (ever!). It’s been a strange and often challenging time, but it’s also a journey filled with self-discovery and some unexpected positives. It took me a while to realize them and get on board with my new lifestyle, but I’m learning to welcome the changes, embrace the challenges as they come, and adapt to my new life on my own. So how do you navigate solitude after divorce and becoming an empty nester?
Adjust to Solitude
When my daughter graduated in 2019 and moved out, the house felt eerily quiet and empty. I had anticipated this moment throughout her senior year of high school, knowing that she would soon turn 18 and leave to start her own life. While I understood that this was a natural progression, as a teen mom who had always had her by my side, the reality was still hard to face. Even though my husband was still at home, I felt an immense sadness when she left, struggling to find a new sense of purpose. I knew she didn’t need me as she did when she was younger, and while I still worry about her safety, I’ve had to trust that she’s a smart and capable young woman. The transition from having her around all the time, especially as my only child, was incredibly challenging.
After my divorce, the silence that began when my daughter left became even more profound. Despite our rocky relationship, it was comforting to know someone else was there in the house with me. Although we had been sleeping in separate rooms for years, just having another person in the home provided a sense of security. We didn’t always communicate much, but knowing he was there for emergencies gave me peace of mind. The days leading up to his departure were daunting, and I was terrified to be on my own. The traditional view that men are the protectors and decision-makers in the home left me feeling vulnerable without him. Adjusting to this new lifestyle has been a slow process, but I’m gradually learning to trust myself, feel safe alone, and find ways to combat loneliness.
Now that I’m completely alone for the first time (minus my beloved furballs), I wanted to share some of my experiences and lessons learned. I hope these insights can help those of you facing similar situations. While I pray none of you have to go through a divorce, if you do, or if you’re transitioning to an empty nest, maybe these tips can ease your journey.
The Challenges
Living alone comes with its set of hurdles. These challenges have tested my resilience and forced me to grow in ways I hadn’t anticipated. Despite the difficulties, I’ve learned valuable skills and become more self-reliant in the process. Here are a few examples that I’ve encountered so far:
Household Maintenance and Repairs:
- Lawn Care: Mowing the lawn and weed eating were tasks my ex-husband typically handled. I had never even sat on the mower before he left, and unfortunately, he wouldn’t show me how to use it. So, the first time I used the lawnmower by myself, I had to learn how to change a flat tire, pump up two more by hand, turn it on, and then I scraped (and probably bent) the blades backing it out of the shed. Although I was nervous and there was a steep learning curve, I was determined because it had to be done, and there was nobody else to do it except me. It was a hot Texas summer day, and it took me several hours longer than it used to take him, but I did it. The sense of accomplishment I felt afterward was worth the sweat and effort.
- Plumbing Issues: When my toilet wouldn’t stop running and eventually turned from a trickle to a full-blown Niagara Falls gush, I felt overwhelmed and unsure where to start. I managed to turn off the water supply, spent hours watching YouTube tutorials, and made several trips to the store trying to find the correct parts to fix it. Despite changing out all the pieces inside the tank, I still couldn’t get it to flush and fill normally. After exhausting every possible solution over a few weeks and stumbling down the hall in the middle of the night to use the guest toilet, I finally broke down and spent the money on a plumber. He was impressed that I had attempted to fix it on my own and even gave me a discount because I was so close to fixing it. It turned out the parts I bought were faulty, which was reassuring as it showed I was on the right track. Although it was frustrating to be so close yet have to spend money I didn’t have on a plumber, it boosted my confidence and made me feel capable knowing I was almost there on my own.
Funny Side Story: The plumbing company was very adamant about keeping pets secured while their workers were on the job. I kept my dogs in the yard, as it was a nice cool day. The cats, however, were inside in the living room, but they were staying out of the way, so I let them be. My big meatball, who doesn’t typically like strangers, was hiding behind the couch. When the plumber finished and we were chatting while I was paying, he finally emerged from his hiding place and jumped up on the coffee table to say hello. The plumber commented on how much my cat looked like his own but couldn’t believe his size (he’s about 20 pounds). I guess my cat didn’t appreciate the comparison, and in true feline form, immediately swatted at the plumber, getting him pretty good on the finger. I was terrified the plumbing company would fine me or something for not having my pets completely secured, but luckily, they didn’t, and the plumber even forgave my cat after a few choice words!
- Emotional Loneliness:
- Coming Home to an Empty House:Walking into a silent home at the end of a long day can be profoundly isolating. I used to look forward to catching up with my daughter or husband, and the absence of that familiar routine leaves a void. While my pets are great listeners, their lack of reciprocation makes it hard to fill that gap.
- Dining Alone: Eating every meal alone is particularly difficult. Dinners and weekend breakfasts were always family affairs, times to connect and share our days without distractions. I deeply miss those conversations and shared laughter. Now, I seize any opportunity to have a meal with my mom, daughter, or friends. Plus, cooking for myself means I always have extra and get bored with the leftovers before I can eat them all. Recently, I’ve considered going to a local restaurant and sitting at the bar, just to be around people, eat something fresh and different (that I don’t have to clean up, added bonus!), and maybe catching an Astros game.
- Entertainment and Social Activities:
- Watching Shows and Movies: Watching TV alone can be lonely, especially if you’re used to discussing the shows and movies with someone else. To fill that gap, I now make it a point to recommend every good show or movie to my mom or a friend and always take others’ recommendations. This way, I have someone to chat with about them.
- Going Out: Whether it’s dining out, attending events, or simply going for a walk, doing these activities alone initially felt awkward. Fortunately, my dogs keep me company on walks, and we’ve recently started going down to the river to play in the water now that it’s summer. Going to the theater alone has never appealed to me, but it might be something worth trying. I’ve surprised myself with how many things I actually enjoy doing alone. Watching a rom-com by myself means I don’t have to worry about anyone else being bored with all the girly meet-cutes and “chick” stuff.
- Grabbing a Drink: Doing this alone used to feel intimidating, but I’ve discovered it’s quite liberating. Whether it’s enjoying a coffee at a cozy café or having a cocktail at a bar, I’ve learned to appreciate my own company and treat myself to these experiences as I would if I were with others. It’s a great way to unwind, people-watch, and even strike up a conversation with someone new if I feel like it.
- Handling Finances:
- Budgeting and Bills: Managing household finances alone was daunting. I had always been in charge of paying the bills, which I preferred, but my ex-husband and I used to pool our money together for this. Suddenly having sole financial responsibility was a significant shift. Even before he left, I started using a budgeting app to keep track of all my expenses and began cutting back on non-essential items like streaming services, nail appointments, and extra high-speed internet. It’s been a steep learning curve and required some sacrifices to our previous lifestyle, but I’m doing just fine with these adjustments. Embracing a simpler life has given me a better understanding of my finances, making me feel more in control despite having substantially less income.
- Unexpected Expenses: When the car needed repairs or an appliance broke down, the financial strain was more acute. Slowly but steadily, I’ve been building an emergency fund to cover unexpected expenses. Although progress is slow due to limited extra income and the need to feed seven mouths, this fund has given me peace of mind and a sense of preparedness.
- Security Concerns:
- Home Security: Living alone made me more conscious of security. While my three large dogs hopefully serve as a deterrent to potential intruders, I’ve also invested in security cameras placed around my home. These cameras might not completely prevent a break-in, but they act as an additional deterrent and can help identify a burglar if it comes to that. Having these measures in place has significantly alleviated my anxiety about being alone.
- Health Emergencies: The thought of having a medical emergency while alone was daunting. To address this, I made sure to have a list of emergency contacts easily accessible and set up regular check-ins with friends or family members. Additionally, I familiarized myself with basic first aid. One of my biggest fears is choking, so I purchased a device that can help dislodge food if I ever choke while alone. These precautions have given me a greater sense of security and readiness.
- Decision-Making Fatigue:
- Making All Decisions Alone: From deciding what to eat for dinner to making significant life decisions, bearing sole responsibility for every choice can be utterly exhausting. To alleviate this burden, I often seek advice from friends or family and streamline daily decisions by planning meals and activities in advance. While plans can always be adjusted later, having a clear idea of what to expect and something to look forward to has been immensely beneficial for my mental well-being.
Find the Silver Linings
Living alone certainly presents its challenges, but it’s also an opportunity to discover joy in the little moments. While there are still days or even longer stretches where I feel lonely and uncertain about what comes next, I’ve found several things that have made the journey easier. Whether it’s the satisfaction of finishing a DIY project, the tranquility of a quiet evening with a good book, or the freedom to watch whatever I want on TV, there are many small pleasures to appreciate. Here are some of the personal discoveries that have helped me embrace and thrive in my newfound solitude:
- Rediscovering Independence:
- Empowerment Through Self-Sufficiency: Handling household tasks and repairs on my own has been incredibly empowering. For instance, I’ve started repainting the inside of my home, something I had never attempted before and something my husband was actually against (not sure why?). Though it’s taken me about 8 or 9 months and I’m still nowhere close to done, the pride I feel looking at the freshly painted walls, knowing I did it myself, is immeasurable. They look so pretty now! Each small victory in self-sufficiency reinforces my capability and independence. I also installed a brand new light fixture in my dining room, which I’m still surprised I even attempted. However, it’s done, I did it all by myself, and it was inexpensive and easy! Now I have a more modern light fixture to go with my half-done freshly repainted walls.
- Not Being Needed for Everything: This aspect of my new life is bittersweet for me. It’s been extremely challenging not to feel needed or wanted anymore, and it has taken time to figure out my new purpose in life. However, having said that, it has been somewhat refreshing not to hear things like “where are my socks” or “hey, can I have 20 bucks?” These types of questions used to come from both my daughter AND ex-husband. While I enjoyed being the hero mom/wife to the rescue, it’s also been nice not to have to know everything for everyone else. Now I have the peace of mind of knowing that I won’t be questioned and if I put something somewhere it will be exactly where I know I left it later (unless a cat gets to it first).
- Personal Growth:
- Time for Self-Reflection: Solitude has provided me with ample time for introspection. I’ve started journaling regularly, which has helped me process my thoughts and emotions. This period of self-reflection has deepened my understanding of myself, my goals, and my values. It’s been a journey of personal growth and self-discovery.
- Pursuing Education and Skills: Investing in oneself and dedicating time to broaden one’s knowledge base is never a waste of time or resources. I’ve begun to consider what new things I want to learn and how I’d like to grow as an individual. Without the need to coordinate plans around others, I’ve started learning Spanish using an app on my phone. Even this small step in self-improvement feels significant and is something I’ve always wanted to do for myself but never prioritized.
- Freedom:
- Redecorating and Personalizing My Space: I’ve fully embraced the freedom to redecorate and rearrange my home according to my tastes and preferences. For instance, I’m converting my daughter’s old room into an office and an oversized closet for myself, and transforming my former step-son’s room into a guest bedroom. These projects are not only enjoyable for me but also make my home feel uniquely mine. There’s no pressure to complete everything quickly; I can work at my own pace, as time and finances allow.
- Flexible Schedule: Without needing to coordinate with anyone else’s schedule, I’ve established routines that suit me and my pets perfectly. I can exercise in the evenings, have dinner whenever I choose, and spend weekends indulging in hobbies or spontaneous outings. Sometimes, I have to remind myself that it’s okay to go and do whatever I want, whenever I want. I used to feel guilty about taking time for myself, but that’s no longer as much of a concern now that I’m on my own.
- Pursuing Hobbies and Interests:
- Rediscovering Old Hobbies: I’ve revisited hobbies that I had set aside. For example, I’ve started writing and painting again—things I loved in my younger years but lost touch with. Rediscovering these passions has been incredibly fulfilling and a wonderful way to spend my free time.
- Exploring New Interests: I’ve also delved into new interests, such as gardening and learning to speak Spanish, as previously mentioned. Engaging in these activities has brought me joy and creativity. Each new skill I acquire adds to my sense of accomplishment and well-roundedness.
- Building a New Social Life:
- Friends: My husband didn’t really care for me to have many friends so the few I did have were connected to him, which made it awkward to maintain those relationships after our divorce. Instead, I’ve been focused on making new friends who know nothing about my past relationship and can get to know the person I am now, in this current chapter of my life. Recently, an old friend mentioned that I seem different after my divorce, and while it may not have been meant positively, I agree. I am different—I’m still myself, but I’ve undergone significant changes physically, mentally, and emotionally, and I’m okay with that. Finding new people who accept me without judgment and appreciate me for who I am now has become very important to me.
- Stepping Out of My Comfort Zone: I’ve actively pushed my anxieties aside and embraced trying new things. From exploring new foods and restaurants to joining community groups and events, I’ve challenged myself to do things I wouldn’t have considered before. This has led me to meet fascinating new people and discover new passions along the way.
- Enhancing Home Comfort:
- Creating a Cozy Environment: I’ve dedicated time and effort to transform my home into a comfortable and inviting space. This includes investing in (affordable!) new furniture that I love sinking into after a long day. Decorating with plants has not only added a touch of greenery but has also brought a sense of calm and serenity to my living spaces. One of my favorite places to relax is my newly designed bedroom, which now feels like a peaceful retreat with soft lighting, soothing colors, and cozy bedding. Removing clutter, especially things that were not mine and were reminders of the past, has been incredibly liberating and has had a positive impact on my mental health. It’s allowed me to create a space that truly reflects who I am now and has significantly improved my overall well-being and mood.
- Personal Projects: Taking on DIY projects around the house has become a fulfilling hobby. I’ve built shelves for my decor and art pieces, and I’ve even created my own artwork to hang on the walls. These projects have not only added a personal touch to my home but have also given me a sense of accomplishment and pride. They’ve allowed me to make my space uniquely mine, which has been empowering and rewarding.
- Self-Care and Wellness:
- Prioritizing Self-Care: Living alone has given me the opportunity to prioritize self-care in ways I never did before. I’ve established a daily self-care routine that includes more down time, a skincare routine, and dedicating time to my hobbies and interests. This routine has become a non-negotiable part of my day and has helped me manage stress and improve my overall well-being. By taking care of myself, I’ve found that I have more energy and a more positive outlook on life.
- Fitness and Health: I’ve rediscovered the joy of incorporating fitness into my daily routine. Activities like lifting weights and low impact cardio have become staples in my schedule, and I love that I can do them at my own pace and on my own time. These activities not only keep me physically fit but also boost my mood and mental clarity. I’ve found that staying active is an essential part of maintaining my health and has become something I genuinely look forward to each day.
Tips for Thriving Alone
Despite the challenges and rollercoaster of emotions you’re bound to feel when living alone for the first time, there are numerous positives and opportunities that await. Here are some things you can do when you’re newly single and/or living alone.
- Learn New Skills: Take this opportunity to learn skills that will make you more self-sufficient. YouTube tutorials have been a lifesaver for me, especially for home repairs.
- Stay Connected: Loneliness can be mitigated by maintaining strong connections with friends and family. Regular calls, video chats, meet-ups, and even virtual hangouts can make a big difference.
- Redefine Routines: Without the need to cater to others’ schedules, you can create routines that suit you perfectly. Whether it’s meal times, workout routines, or leisure activities, tailor your daily life to what feels best for you.
- Pursue Hobbies: Dive into hobbies or interests you’ve always wanted to explore. For me, it’s been a mix of redecorating, writing, and picking up new crafts.
- Adopt Pets: If you don’t already have pets, consider adopting. My furballs, although hard to care for all by myself at first (there are 6 of them and I’m outnumbered haha!), have been an incredible source of comfort and companionship. They fill my home with energy and unconditional love. And their ability to sense my sadness or loneliness sometimes and provide extra snuggles at just the right time is so incredibly amazing!
- Join Groups: Look for local clubs or groups that align with your interests. Whether it’s a book club, hiking group, or cooking class, these activities can help you meet new people and create a sense of community.
- Volunteering: Volunteering at local charities has been another fulfilling way to spend free time. It’s not only rewarding to give back to the community, but it’s also provided a sense of purpose and can connect you with like-minded individuals.
- Enjoy the Solitude: Take advantage of the quiet to practice self-care and mindfulness. Whether it’s a long bath, journaling, or simply enjoying a cup of tea in peace, these moments can be deeply restorative.
Final Thoughts
Transitioning to living alone is undeniably challenging, but each obstacle overcome brings a sense of accomplishment and self-reliance. It’s a journey of rediscovery and empowerment. By sharing these experiences and tips, I hope to offer support and solidarity to those of you facing similar transitions. Remember, it’s okay to feel lonely at times, but it’s also okay to find joy in your own company and every challenge is an opportunity for growth and learning. With each step, we become more capable and confident, ready to embrace the next chapter of our lives.
To all the women out there navigating similar transitions, know that you’re not alone. We’re all in this together, finding our way, one day at a time.
As always, with lots of love,
-LS
by Lindsay | Mar 20, 2024 | Miscellaneous, Motivational
Howdy fellow working women!
Let’s discuss a topic that resonates deeply with many of us: navigating career transitions. This is something that has been hitting so close to home with me lately, especially since it seems like literally everything else in my life changed and was turned upside down from what I was used to during my recent divorce. As I’ve realized now more than ever, it’s challenging to be at this crossroad in so many areas of my life, but especially professionally and especially all at once. The pull I’m experiencing for career change might have been propelled by all the other major life changes, facing pivotal moments and milestones whether I wanted to or not, that demanded me to take careful consideration in all areas of my life.
If you’re in a similar situation, whether it’s contemplating a switch in industries, re-entering the workforce after a break to raise your family or be a SAHM, or leaving your 9-5 to begin on an entrepreneurial journey, these transitions can be both daunting and exhilarating. I’m right there with you, so let’s chat about some practical insights, personal reflections, and valuable resources to help us all navigate these shifts with grace and purpose at this stage in our lives.
Embrace the Journey
First and foremost, let’s acknowledge that career transitions are a natural part of life’s journey. We don’t all keep the nannying position we had after school or the part time weekend bartending job we had in college. If you ended up growing to the bar manager position or started your own daycare center, awesome! But for those of you that outgrew the part time or temporary positions you were in at earlier stages in your life or needed more financial security than part time jobs could offer, remember that’s perfectly normal as well. Sometimes different jobs serve us better as different points in our life and aren’t meant to be our lifelong career path. Sometimes they’re just temporary to bridge us in the in between time or get us through school while working toward our ultimate career goals. During these huge transitions in our lives from one chapter and one workplace to another, it’s absolutely okay to feel uncertain or anxious about the unknown. Embrace this period of transition as an opportunity for growth and self-discovery. Remember, you’ve already accumulated a wealth of skills and experiences, both from out in the workforce and at home managing your household and family, that will serve as your compass in navigating this new terrain.
Define Your Why
Before leaping into a new career path, take the time to reflect on your motivations and values. What drives you? What brings you joy and fulfillment? What are your goals? Think about the goals you have for both yourself individually and for your family if you have one, along with your short term and longer term goals. Understanding your “why” will not only guide your decision-making process, but also fuel your motivation and determination during challenging times. Whether you’re seeking a greater work-life balance, better professional fulfillment, or the pursuit of a passion project (three of my personal “whys”), clarity on your priorities will set the foundation for success during this period.
Do It Scared
One crucial piece of advice for anyone considering a career transition is to embrace the fear and “do it scared.” It’s natural to feel anxious or uncertain about stepping into the unknown, but those feelings shouldn’t hold you back. In fact, some of the most rewarding experiences come from taking risks and pushing past our comfort zones. Courage isn’t the absence of fear, but the determination to forge ahead despite it. Every successful person you admire has faced their own fears and doubts. By acknowledging your fears and still choosing to move forward, you’re not only building resilience but also opening the door to growth and new opportunities. So, take a deep breath, trust in your abilities, and make that leap of faith. Your future self will thank you for it.
Leverage Your Transferable Skills
Transitioning to a new industry or role may seem scary, but don’t underestimate the power of your transferable skills. As women in our 30s and beyond, we’ve honed a diverse set of abilities, from multitasking and problem-solving to communication and leadership, that are invaluable across various domains. Identify and showcase these transferable skills as you begin on your career transition, highlighting how they align with the requirements of your desired role or venture. Think about which of your skills fulfills you, which you’re best at, and which make the most sense with the new path you’re looking to go down. Really focus on these skills, practice and master them, and own them! Having confidence in yourself when interviewing with new employers or prospective clients is crucial.
Continue to Learn
In today’s rapidly evolving job market, the willingness to learn and adapt is paramount. Whether you’re transitioning to a new field or launching your own venture, commit to ongoing education and skill development. There are a plethora of resources available today, so in order to stay on the top of your market and be competitive in your new venture, being an open book and willing to expand your knowledge base is so important. Explore online courses, workshops, or certifications relevant to your desired career path. Practice a growth mindset, viewing challenges as opportunities for learning and development. It’s not about having all the answers, but about being resourceful, having the resources available to you when needed, and being willing to grow into your new career so you can be the best you can be.
Network, Network, Network
They say your network is your net worth and this rings especially true during career transitions. Leverage your professional and personal connections to explore new opportunities, gain insights into different industries, and seek mentorship from those who have walked a similar path. Attend networking events, join industry-specific social media groups or online communities, and don’t hesitate to reach out to individuals whose careers inspire you. Networking isn’t just about securing job leads, but is also about building meaningful relationships that can support you throughout your career journey. LinkedIn is a great platform for making professional contacts, as well as for seeking job opportunities.
Seek Support
Navigating career transitions can feel isolating at times, but remember that you’re not alone. Utilize your support systems that can provide encouragement, guidance, and a listening ear during this journey. This might include friends, family members, mentors, or professional coaches who can offer valuable insights and perspective. Surround yourself with individuals who believe in your potential and are invested in your success. And don’t hesitate to lean on them for support when needed.
Be Resilient
Career transitions are rarely linear and setbacks or roadblocks are inevitable along the way. Embrace resilience as your greatest ally in navigating the ups and downs of your professional journey. Recognize that any “failures” are not really failures or a reflection of your worth, but rather challenges to learn, grow, and pivot toward new opportunities. Having a resilient mindset that thrives in the face of adversity and knowing that each challenge is merely a necessary stepping stone toward greater success is a positive plus to helping you stay motivated to reach your career goals.
Celebrate Your Wins
Amidst the uncertainties and adversities of career transitions, don’t forget to celebrate your wins, both big and small. Whether you land a new job, launch a business, or master a new skill, take the time to acknowledge and appreciate your achievements. Celebrate your courage, perseverance, intelligence, and your unwavering commitment in yourself to pursue your passions and goals. Every step forward is a testament to your strength and determination.
As we navigate the twists and turns of our professional journeys in our 30s, 40s, or 50s, embark on each career transition with the mindset of an opportunity for growth, fulfillment, and success. By defining our why, leveraging our skills, nurturing our networks, and embracing resilience, we can navigate these transitions with confidence and purpose. The path to career fulfillment is rarely straightforward or easy, but with hard work, support, and a willingness to jump head first into change, we can chart a course towards a brighter and more fulfilling future.
Please share your own experiences, insights, and tips for navigating career transitions with me! Together, let’s empower and support each other on this journey towards professional fulfillment and success.
Cheers to the beauty of change and the endless possibilities that lie ahead, and with love as always,
-LS
by Lindsay | Jan 24, 2024 | Motivational
Hey, friends!
Imagine waking up every morning feeling refreshed, energized, and ready to tackle the day ahead with a sense of purpose and direction. A productive start to your day is so beneficial in that it can help set the tone for how you navigate through the rest of your hours. Obviously the first key factor in that is to get a good night’s sleep. However, once you’re up and awake, by incorporating some small steps into the first part of your day and establishing a solid morning routine, you can unlock a world of potential within yourself. Simple things like focusing on planning and prioritizing daily tasks, properly fueling your body, getting ready physically and mentally, journaling, and taking time to meditate or pray can have such a positive impact. The objective is to be your most productive self every day and hopefully these seven tips will not only help you make the most out of your mornings and set you up for successful days, but also empower you to seize each day with enthusiasm and intention. So grab a cup of coffee (or tea), sit back, and get ready to transform your mornings into a powerful springboard for daily success!
Establish a morning routine: Consistent habits help set the tone
Establishing a morning routine is the cornerstone of setting a positive tone for your day. Consistent habits can give you a sense of structure, which I know personally helps me thrive, as well as give a sense of control over your time and actions.
Start by making your bed. This sounds simple and mundane, but this 2 minute task can create a huge sense of accomplishment and discipline right from the start. I do this every single day religiously, even when I’m planning a lounge day where I might pop back into bed mid-morning to watch a movie or mid-afternoon for a pick-me-up nap. And I also remake the bed again after every time I lay in it, just so it’s nice and fresh when I’m ready for sleep that evening.
Following up the bed making with your go-to “get ready” routine is a great next step. A refreshing shower, getting dressed, and fixing your hair and makeup can boost your confidence and drive for the day ahead.
By taking care of these basic grooming tasks in the morning, you signal to yourself that you are ready to face whatever challenges come your way. A well-groomed appearance can also enhance your self-esteem and make you feel more prepared to tackle any obstacles that may arise throughout the day. Dressing intentionally can further help set the tone for productivity, so choosing an outfit that makes you feel great about and confident in yourself can significantly impact how you approach tasks and interactions throughout the day.
The amount of “getting ready” you do can vary day to day, of course, but the most important part is taking that time for yourself and sticking with the routine, even if it’s a shortened version. Some days, like on a Tuesday when you have an important client luncheon and then taco Tuesday and margarita night with girlfriends after work, you might opt for a little more effort on your hair and makeup in the morning, along with wearing something a little more sophisticated that can easily go from day to night. Other days, like on a rainy Saturday, it might be just brushing your teeth and throwing on some lip gloss, leggings, and a messy bun. At least if you need to run to the grocery store later in the day you’ll already be ready! This small step can set you up for success even on your more relaxed days.
If you have pets, or in my case a small zoo, don’t forget to include them into your morning routine as well. My personal morning routine looks more like making my bed, letting all the dogs outside, feeding both the dogs and cats breakfast, then I start personally getting ready while they eat. By the time I’m done, the pups are usually ready to go out again while I move on to the next parts of my morning, which is food!
Eat a nutritious breakfast: Fuel your body.
Starting your day with a nutritious breakfast not only provides the necessary fuel for your body, but also jumpstarts your brain, helping you to better focus on the activities ahead. It’s crucial to remember that even a small morning meal can make a significant difference in your productivity levels throughout the day. Nourishing yourself properly at the beginning of the day, breaks the fast and sets a positive tone for your body for the rest of your day (unless of course you’re doing intermittent fasting, then in which case ignore this whole tip haha).
Aim to include a variety of food groups in your breakfast to ensure a well-rounded nutritional intake, which can enhance overall brain function and sustain your energy level until lunchtime. Consider incorporating whole grains, proteins, fruits, and veggies into your morning meal for optimal benefits. Something like a smoothie can be an amazing source of all these, as well as a quick and easy option if you’re short on time. Remember, food is more than just sustenance; it’s an essential tool in maintaining mental clarity and enhancing productivity from the moment you wake up.
Exercise or stretch: Boost energy and focus.
One of the most effective ways to kickstart a productive day is by incorporating some form of exercise or stretching into your morning routine. Movement can boost your energy levels and help enhance focus and mental sharpness. Research shows that even a short walk can elevate mood and increase cognitive function, making it an ideal way to jumpstart your day. So grab your furry friends and get outside before continuing your day!
By engaging in daily movement, whether it’s a quick yoga session or some light cardio, it’s a signal to yourself that it’s time to focus and be productive. Physical activity releases endorphins, which are known as the feel-good hormones that help combat stress and improve overall well-being. So the next time you feel sluggish or unfocused in the morning, consider lacing up those sneaks for a revitalizing workout session that will set a positive tone for the rest of your day.
Remember, movement doesn’t have to be intense or time-consuming to reap its benefits. Even simple stretching exercises for a few minutes can stimulate blood flow and oxygen circulation throughout your body, leading to increased alertness and productivity. It’s totally fine to save the gym session or intense high-impact training for later in the day. Personally I do better working out more intensely in the evenings, so I keep my morning movements light and quick. On the days I do opt for a more intense morning session, I’ll do a low-impact fasted cardio, which I actually complete before moving on to showering and breakfast. Depending on the style, intensity, and length of your individual morning workouts, you might also prefer to do them every morning before eating and getting ready. No matter the order, these are just suggestions that work for me, but please do whatever works for your body, mind, and schedule. Embrace the power of movement, even short and sweet ones, as a tool to enhance focus and motivation right from the start of your day, setting yourself up for success in all your endeavors.
Set goals for the day: Stay organized.
When aiming for a productive start to your day, setting clear goals is essential. Be specific with what you want to achieve and outline the steps needed to get there. Break down larger tasks into smaller, more manageable ones which can help maintain focus and motivation throughout the day. By prioritizing these goals, you ensure that your time and energy are dedicated to what truly matters, increasing your efficiency and productivity.
To further boost productivity, consider time blocking as a strategy to stay on track. Allocate specific time slots for different tasks or activities, providing structure to your day while reducing distractions. This method might be helpful to ensure that every task receives attention and also allows for breaks in between activities, promoting a balanced workflow. Embrace this time management approach as a way to enhance productivity and achieve your daily objectives successfully.
Prioritize tasks: Focus on the most important first.
Along the same lines as goal setting, another good method to kickstart a productive day is to set aside some time in the morning to plan and prioritize your tasks. In addition to goals and the things you WANT to get done, you might have things you NEED to get done. Utilize a calendar, scheduling tool, or task managing program to map out your day, allocating specific time slots for essential activities. By having a clear roadmap, you can stay focused and organized throughout the day, ensuring that no task slips through the cracks and you have plenty of time for both the things you want and need to accomplish every day to meet your goals.
Prioritizing tasks is key to enhancing productivity. If you have the time in your schedule, depending on what each day looks like, you might opt to start your day by tackling the most important, challenging, or time-consuming tasks first. This could allow you to focus your energy on high-impact activities first and get them out of the way to focus on easier or less structured things later on in the afternoon. Tackling the tough stuff first and getting it out of the way will then free up mental space for other tasks as you progress through your schedule. Remember, effective planning coupled with strategic prioritization are powerful tools in achieving a productive start to your day!
Minimize distractions: Create a focused environment.
To maximize productivity at the start of your day, it’s crucial to minimize distractions and create a focused environment. One effective way to achieve this is by keeping your phone out of sight while planning your goals and tasks for the day, as well as when working. By reducing the temptation to constantly check notifications or scroll through social media, you can maintain better concentration and significantly boost your workflow productivity and time management. In addition, setting specific goals for each work session can provide a clear direction and purpose, helping you stay on track and make progress towards achieving your objectives. It’s totally fine to pencil in some social media and other scrolling times! Just be sure you’re not doing it during the times you’ve blocked off to focus on work.
Staying focused is not just about avoiding external distractions however. It also involves managing internal interruptions, such as procrastination or self-doubt. Maintaining a positive mindset and having self-discipline are key factors in successfully navigating daily tasks and responsibilities. By staying committed to minimizing distractions, reminding yourself to stay on tasks and stay motivated, remaining attentive to your goals, and actively working towards achieving them, you’ll set yourself up for a highly productive start to each day. Personally, I like to look at my days like this: the sooner I can get everything done, the sooner I’m free to enjoy time with my furballs or a night out with friends. The only way to do that is to limit distractions, stay focused, and get it done!
Practice mindfulness or meditation: Center yourself.
One powerful way to start your day on a productive note is by incorporating mindfulness or meditation into your morning routine. Taking a few moments to center yourself, clear your mind, and focus on the present can significantly enhance your mental clarity and set a positive tone for the day ahead. This practice not only boosts productivity, but also promotes overall well-being, helping you navigate challenges with a calmer demeanor. Personally during my “meditation” time is when I pray or read my Bible. Even if it’s only for 20 minutes each morning, taking this “me” time to relax, clear my mind, envision my day, and talk to God is a perfect way to get a successful day started.
Another key tip for maximizing productivity is being intentional with your time and attention. By setting clear goals and priorities for the day, you can allocate resources effectively and stay focused on what truly matters. Avoiding distractions and unnecessary tasks allows you to invest energy in activities that align with your long-term objectives, leading to greater success and fulfillment in both personal and professional endeavors.
Follow these tips to start your day right!
Incorporating these 7 tips into your morning routine can set the tone for a productive and successful day ahead. By prioritizing tasks and goals, avoiding distractions, and being intentional with your actions, you can boost your efficiency and focus. Remember to nourish your body with a healthy breakfast and some exercise to energize your mind and body. Establishing a consistent morning “get ready” routine will provide structure and stability, helping you stay organized and prepared for whatever challenges come your way. Start implementing some or all of these tips tomorrow morning to experience a more productive start to each day. I hope you’re able to quickly see how they transform your mornings into opportunities for growth and achievement!
With love and productive vibes,
-LS
by Lindsay | Jan 3, 2024 | Motivational
Hi friends!
Have you ever felt called to do something? Like a deep-down burning passion for something you felt you were meant to do? For as long as I can remember, I’ve always felt a desire inside me like that to be a writer. However, as I sit down to write this, my very first blog post, I’m filled with not only a sense of excitement and purpose to be starting on this journey, but also of fear and uncertainty. Becoming a blogger is not just about sharing my thoughts with the internet world, but it’s also what I hope to be the beginning of fully embracing my calling as a writer.
Feeling The Fear
This is so scary because what if I fail? Or, unlike being a non-fiction writer, for example, sharing my unique perspectives and opinions through these blog posts is much more personal. What if that makes me feel a little too vulnerable for comfort and I want to give up? What if someone doesn’t agree with me or criticizes me for my opinions? Will I have a thick enough skin to brush off any possible haters? Who knows? Nevertheless, with this strong inner desire I’ve always felt to put pen to paper (well, fingers to keyboard), I really am compelled to share stories in hopes of resonating with others through my experiences.
Challenge Accepted
I feel like blogging specifically is going to be a way for me to get into a routine of practicing my writing in preparation for future projects, as well as giving me a creative outlet and a way to communicate to others far beyond on my typical day-to-day reach in my little office at work or my tiny hometown in Texas. I feel like I’ve truly lived and been through enough situations in my time on this beautiful earth that might prove to be valuable to share with others. One of my goals is for this to be so much more than just a hobby, passion project, or practice for myself though. I really do feel like writing is my divine calling and something that I just need to push through the fear to embrace to not only make myself happy and feel accomplished, but also as an opportunity to hopefully make an impact in others’ lives. To me, that’s absolutely the end goal, an added bonus, and a challenge that I hope I can live up to in the process.
How It All Started
I think this passion I feel all started sometime in my early 20s. I’m someone who isn’t embracing the aging process well mentally, which started way before it probably should have, and the thought of turning 30 was always very daunting for me. Prior to my 30th birthday, I had a sort of checklist of the things I’d envisioned for my life by the time I hit 30 and I felt so much pressure to have these things completed on time, even though I was the only one putting pressure on meeting these goals. Most of the list was comprised of what I assume to be typical pre-midlife aspirations like:
- Getting married
- Growing my family
- Buying my first home
I know those three seem pretty normal, especially for a young woman, but there was always one more on my list that I really felt strongly about accomplishing: publishing a book. I kind of think publishing a book is pretty unusual for your average twenty-something. However, for as long as I can recall, this has always been on my list and something I’ve longed to do.
I had already started my family when I had my daughter as a teenager, so technically I could cross that off the list, even thought I had always hoped to have more children. And by God’s grace alone I was able to purchase my first home all on my own just 11 days shy of my 30th birthday, so that too was miraculously able to be checked off my (self-imposed) list. Despite not being married by 30 and that probably being the one thing I felt the most outside pressure about, I have to say that honestly, the biggest disappointment at 30 was that I wasn’t yet a published author and hadn’t even officially made efforts to begin my writing journey. I really never prioritized that dream, despite always remembering having it, and reasoned that it was just because I was too busy working full time and being a single mom to my young daughter. But in all honesty, maybe it was also partially that I never really took myself seriously enough to think that I could actually publish a book or be of any real value to others with the things had to share through any writing I might produce.
My Inspiration: The Sweetest Gift from the Sweetest Girl
Knowing about my little “30-year-old bucket list”, if you will, on my 30th birthday my daughter gifted me a beautiful journal and pen. Inside the cover of the journal was a handwritten note that said:
“Since you didn’t finish your book
before your 30th birthday, now
you’ll have to finish it before mine”.
Oh my goodness, did I cry! Not only did my daughter know my dreams, but she wanted to see me achieve them and even wanted to help me do so in such a sweet way. She probably doesn’t know this, but knowing how much she was supporting me and that she was invested in my dreams was even more of a driving factor in my wanting to achieve them. What an amazing example it would be to demonstrate to my impressionable daughter to be able to be an independent, young, working mom and also accomplish my personal goals.
Not Believing In Myself Led to Procrastination
Now here we are nearly 10 years later (and only 7.5 years away from my daughter turning 30) and I’m no closer to reaching my goals than I was while approaching 30. That journal from my daughter, which will someday be the first draft of my book, is still blank at this time. My doubt in myself has led to me putting my dreams on the back burner, making excuses, and really just prolonging the timeframe in which I might actually be able to accomplish my goal.
The Rollercoaster Trying to Stop Me
Last year was truly a dumpster fire for me. I’ll save the specifics for another time, but trust me when I say it was rough. Honestly, the last 12 months have been the most difficult of my entire life. Luckily the year ended so much better than it started, but still, going through all the devastation I did so abruptly and so unexpectedly has really blindsided me and flipped my world upside down. I went through so many changes and was forced to face so many of my biggest fears all at once. But, I’m happy and proud to say with the support of my mom and daughter, and with a huge amount of faith and trust in God, I made it through! In the process, I’ve also realized that I’m so much more capable than I’ve ever dreamed I could be and with that, I have a renewed sense of motivation and determination. Combine that with the start of a new year, and I really do feel like this is the perfect time to start another new endeavor that I’ve been too afraid and been putting off for far long enough.
So this is my start. This year is the year I finally stop making excuses, procrastinating, letting fear and being in a rut stand in my way, and I start striving for my desires to write; for myself, for my daughter, and for anyone else who might stumble across this blog or anything else I might be blessed enough to write in the future.
A lot of the challenges and circumstances that began to transpire in the past year are still ongoing and yet to be 100% resolved. Along with that and the fact that I still work long full-time hours at a demanding job, I know that starting this blog and being consistent with my passion of writing will take effort. However, I really do feel that this is my time to make time for this, to prioritize this, to stop fearing this, and to embrace this. This is my calling. I can and will do it because it’s been something I’ve been longing for for so long.
In fact, earlier today I actually stumbled across a note in my phone from about 11 years ago with things I wanted to write about either in a blog post or short story format. Finding this note just solidified that this isn’t just a wild pipe dream I came up with one day. This desire to write has been something pulling at me and that I obviously have wanted to start at many different points throughout the last 10+ years. Now more than ever, in the midst of all the other changes I’ve been forced to embrace, I’m ready to change one more thing and start on my calling. If I can just push through the fear and doubt, I know it will be worth it because it’s both something for myself and something I can share with others.
Although this new journey ahead feels a little daunting, I truly feel empowered now more than ever after everything I’ve overcome the last year and that I’m finally stepping into my true purpose. I’m hoping my words have the potential to inspire, comfort, promote joy, or ignite change in those who take the time to read them. This isn’t just about fulfilling a promise to my myself and my daughter, but it’s about honoring myself and answering the call that has been tugging at me for so long. With each blog new post, I’m not only starting on this path as a writer, but also shaping myself into the embodiment of strength and creativity that I feel has always been within me. I look forward to reaching you all in the process as well. I sincerely appreciate anyone who takes the time to read these posts and share this little corner of the internet with me.
Can You Relate?
Is there something you feel strongly about that you’ve been putting off? For example, maybe you find a passion in cooking for others. Do you feel enjoyment out of preparing a beautiful meal for your loved ones? Well, maybe that’s your calling! Whether you love watching the look on your husband’s and kid’s faces as they take their first bite of a gourmet meal you made in the privacy of your own kitchen, you like donating your time to cook for others in a soup kitchen, or you decide to study at Culinary School and work in a Michelin Star restaurant, maybe cooking and seeing people enjoy the food you prepare is your calling. Take that next step and turn the tugging you feel inside into something you put into practice in your daily life, volunteer-time, or work week.
Now It’s Your Turn
Whatever it is that you’ve always felt compelled to do, whether it be a hobby, something for your family, or a new career path for you, I encourage you to no longer let fear or doubt stand in your way. This is my personal invitation to you to get out there and embrace your calling. I hope you find your true happiness and it’s the start of a brand new chapter of your life. Don’t be afraid and remember that it’s never too late. You can do this!
Happy New Year and with so much love and gratitude, welcome to my blog!
-LS
